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Who's Line Is It Anyway?

Morning, just before 9 a.m., and I need to make a call.

No dial tone. So I hang up.

Hmmm.

I pick up the phone again.

Still no dial tone.

"Uh, hello?"

"Hello?" a voice replies.

"Hello?!?"

Who is this on my phone?

"This is Bell Canada, may I help you?"

"Uh, I just picked up the phone and you were there!"

"Well, I'm on the line here with John setting up his new phone. Somehow we must have crossed lines."

"Pardon?"

"The new phone line. Your line must be crossed with the new phone line we're setting up. If you give me a few minutes to finish with John, I'll forward this case onto our repair department and they'll take care of it today."

"So... do I hang up now?"

"Yes sir, please hang up. Sorry for the mix up."

...

I wait 30 minutes. The dial tone has returned.

...

Later that day, I come into the house after doing a number of chores. Griffin the cat is begging for attention. I pick her up, banging my hip against the kitchen counter in the process. Griffin is grateful for the scratches, and leaps to the floor.

I hear a far away, "hello?"

Thinking it's Catherine upstairs I call out, "hello!"

She replies, "hello!"

Again, from a distance, "hello? Is anyone there?"

What the... that sounds like it's coming from a small speaker... that's not Catherine... what is that...

Instinctively, I grab my cell phone.

"Hello?!?"

"Hello! This is Bell Canada! Is there something I can help you with?!?"

"Uh, you called me!"

"No sir, this line only accepts incoming calls. You called me!"

"No, I... OH," I shout, suddenly understanding.

"This is my cell phone!"

"You're cell phone?!?"

"Yes... it was on my... on my... on my..."

"Yes?!?"

"It was on my belt! I must have accidentally bumped the phone and somehow I got through to you!"

The Bell Canada operator begins laughing.

I start laughing.

"Isn't that strange?!?"

"Yes sir, it is!" still laughing.

"Well... uh... thank you for your patience, and for yelling "hello" so loudly!"

"Not a problem, sir! So, if there's nothing more I can help you with..."

"Oh no, I'm fine. And I'll try not to do that again!"

"Thank you sir. Have a nice day!"

Andrew Duff can be found by Bell Canada virtually anywhere, but most often in Toronto, Canada.